Healthy Habits

Does anyone else over commit themselves - or are put in situations where it’s easy to feel like there are just not enough hours in the day?  Where the amount of things that you need to accomplish feels endless and the list of to do’s is ever growing?

Insert hysterical laughing here.

I feel like I’ve been doing a lot of that this week. The list of things I need, the to do list, the I’m doing this list … seems endless … for every one item scratched off - two more items take its place.  There is a Greek mythology reference in there somewhere.  

What is interesting is what and how I‘ve been prioritizing and managing my time.  Historically I would have dialed back on anything supporting my needs … moving, eating well, getting up early.  Especially this week … losing an hour of sleep, changing weather, one fire after another at work … I’m exhausted.  Yet, I’ve been getting up, I’ve been walking … I’ve been keeping myself in the mix.  

There’s a new habit.  

Apparently I’ve been connecting the dots from the books and podcasts I’ve been digesting of late … Time is a relationship.  Honestly, I’m starting to realize - everything is a relationship.  

Time - money - health - career … all of it. 

How I manage it - all of it - is a reflection of my energy, my attitude, my focus.  

That’s not to say these are infinite … well, they are … but, my time, my energy, my focus … they are precious, valuable … so where they go, how they are spent … that’s on me. 

I’m still figuring this out.  But there has been a shift.  This week has thrown a slew of curve balls, the list of things - some might call the list daunting, overwhelming, exhausting.  Yet somehow, I’m not in panic mode.  I’m eerily calm actually.  To the point where I wondered if I was in denial or flat out avoiding the reality of my March and April.  

I had to seriously consider that possibility … I am in a low energy space, I haven’t been packing, I haven’t worked on my project, I’ve spent WAY too much time on my socials … the evidence doesn’t look good.  

Then I realized, I know what’s coming … I’m not in denial … I’m not avoiding … as Gandalf said “it’s the deep breath before the plunge” … 

If I look at what is coming … I can feel overwhelmed, I can dread it … or, I can appreciate that I have the luxury of time, of overlap … not everyone can afford that.  I get to take something that was built for my parents and turn it into something reminiscent of me … and do that using the skills my father taught me … knowing that when it’s done, I can look at it and know that it was a result of my efforts, my creativity, my time.  That makes it worth it.  

While I’m juggling a lot … I’m still balancing time with friends, with family.  In fact, I’ll actually get more time with my sister than I would normally have.  Learning how to patch walls and baseboards, apply caulking … when all is said and done, I get to clean my home, turn a space into a place that reflects my warmth, my style … turn it into a reflection of me.  

My agenda has free blocks of time because I’m not avoiding work. My brain and clutter have a problematic relationship - they don’t play well together.  Those free blocks I need - to help myself shut down, process the day, to let go.  They are a gift to myself.  

I have exactly one month before moving day … one month to pack, declutter, patch walls, clean, paint, sand, sand, sand, stain, seal, work, travel for work and that’s just scratching the surface.  

Laughs … 

It will all get done.  What’s more … with every packed box, with every trip to the new place, I get to be reminded of how lucky I am.  I have friends, family giving up their weekends to help me - rip up carpet, patch walls, paint.  Friends taking a day off of work to help with moving, unpacking, moving furniture into the best layout, curating pictures into the new groupings based on the new wall space, lighting and layout. 

They are showing up for me in the most amazing way.  

That is way more overwhelming than a full calendar and in a really big and awe inspiring kind of way.  

I have healthy relationships.  They might not be perfect, but they are good.  They’ve given me the foundation.  I can transfer that knowledge to health, to money, to time.  

I like this new way of thinking.  It feels healthy.  It feels like it could be a habitual way of thinking, of being.  Healthy - habits … I’ll take that win … I’ll take that growth.